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Date: 2016-08-24 09:50 pm (UTC)
andrewducker: (Default)
From: [personal profile] andrewducker
I'd cut the first 20 minutes of flashback/setup entirely. Completely superfluous, and pretty much all of the information in it can be either inferred from elsewhere, or is actively repeated later on.

And I'd change up the enemies. Start with simply converted humans, and then throw in more complex monsters, made my merging them together, and have the enchantress get more frustrated and divert more energy as she does so.

And yes, make many of the character less repellent.
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James Brough

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